Hi, everyone. Just want to wish all of my followers and anyone else who has checked out my blog a happy and healthy New Year. I have a number of cinematic resolutions that I mean to adhere to for 2014, and though that’s easier said than done, I believe they’re basic enough so as to preclude any straying. Here they are:
Resolution #1: to refrain from counting aloud the inordinate number of previews shown before movie viewings at any theater
Resolution #2: to keep guffaws to a minimum while watching trailers for any feudal-Japan-set film with an American protagonist who has been enslaved or recruited by samurai who need him to fight some sort of ludicrous supernatural enemy
Resolution #3: to smirk only briefly at every ad touting a new stage musical based on a flick that wasn’t so good to begin with
Resolution #4: to continue to praise unsung motion pictures and criticize overrated ones
Resolution #5: to avoid any concert films starring bands or “artists” who raise their hands while they sing
Resolution #6: to run far, far away from 3-D flicks about flash mobs, dance contests or zombies
Resolution #7: to eschew the butter-flavored topping on my popcorn during at least one trip to the cinema
Resolution #8: to lament the dearth of $2 second-run movie theaters in my area
Resolution #9: to shun animated films about polar bears, talking birds or prehistoric hominids
Resolution #10: to watch as many good movies as I can